Monday, May 04, 2009

Saludos, Amigos!

An open letter to all Mexicans, non-Mexicans, and part-time Mexicans.

As if the prospect of imminent and painful death were not enough, there's something above and beyond that I just re-realized: (Is that a word? You know, if you know something, forget about it, and suddenly, a blinding flash of the obvious… Like when I was in a dark room, trying to pull down the shades for a full thirty seconds before re-realizing that I had replaced the shades with curtains months before. But I digress.)

The fact I re-realized is: Tequila comes from Mexico. If Mexico is wiped out by the swine flu, I'll have to go back to bourbon. Please take whatever precautions are necessary to prevent this terrible disaster.

I need you to produce tequila and other necessities for me. And you need me to buy said necessities from you.

And then there's another point. You see, in my line of business, fortunately, I can deliver my product by email, if need be. That entails a different virus threat, but we won't go there now.

But you guys are in the business of growing and manufacturing tangible products. So please, please don't sneeze into the tequila.

God, I'm giving you ideas. That may have more of an effect than Alcoholics Anonymous could ever hope to…

Anyway, have a great Cinco de Mayo — at home. Viva la Mexico!

Your friend in spirit,


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